New Riffs, New Song - cool or gross?

[crooked09]

So I'm working on this new song, Ive got a few riffs and I'm experimenting with nonstandard harmonies/ desync'd guitar parts. Do you think it sounds cool, or weird/annoying? Or just what vibe are you getting out of it at all? And how about flow of the riffs - does anything seem awkward?

Any time I'm trying something "novel" I have to step back and decide if it's working or if I just kind of like it because it accomplished my technical goal... hopefully you guys can help.

Thanks for any input!

edit: bumped this thread with a new version, check out post below and listen to that one. could listen to this one if you wanted to though :p

[jjb]

Has a lot of energy, and is different from the standard fare (that's good). Think it would make a good element of a hard driving metal piece. However, it is a bit discordant (as you wanted it to be) and, as such, I'd use it sparingly in the final composition.

jjb

[TheJoker]

I like the idea, definitely agree that it could work.

With tighter playing and well, um... tighter guitar tone (right now it's kinda muddying up your tremolo picking) and drums to pull it all together, this could be the basis of a really cool track.

I'm envisioning it as a bridge of sorts?

[cptfiasco]

refreshing for a metal piece, would be interested in the final piece

[crooked09]

cool, thanks for the responses. I'll definitely keep working on it then, and post it up when its done. Though it'll probably be awhile before the finished product is out, it always seems to take a long time to get vocals done.

This was actually intended as the intro + first verse/chorus, something like that

[TheJoker]

cool, I'll be keeping an eye out for it.

[oldmusicguy]

What's so weird about the harmonies??? Sounds good to me.

[Lochy]

Liked it.
Tighter'n'brighter will bring this together.
Look forward to hearing what you do with this.

[crooked09]

Wanted to bump this because I've got a new version. (har har I'm a slow worker)

Same main riff and general song idea, different direction - I like the individual riffs of this version more. However, I am questioning the flow of the riffs, like do they fit together/sound appropriate in this order... there is a slightly different tone to the second and third riffs compared to the main, and I'm unsure if it is a welcome contrast or not

Comments and thoughts appreciated