Achieving the best fake drums

[EnSkorSang]

From talking to people Ive found that the two most commonly (mis)used VSTs are drums and strings for the home recording pop/rock artist, and its certainly true for me. Most sample libraries are now so well put together that theoretically you should be able to get great results, but my drums are always easy to tell from real drums. What tips do people have when it comes to both programming in the drums, and mixing them in with the rest of the track? One of the most common comments I get from none-musician listeners is that the drums sound like they were being played completely seperately to the rest of the track.